Children who have experienced violence or abuse may carry trauma into every aspect of their lives. Trauma can profoundly disrupt a child’s life, especially when they experience it in their younger formative years. Childhood trauma can turn even the smallest surprises or changes into overwhelming challenges, which can make preparing to return to school tough.
If you’re a parent or caregiver of a child who has experienced trauma, preparing them for that first day back can feel daunting.
To help ease the transition, our trauma and child trauma experts prepared some information and tips to help you understand trauma in supporting children to go back to school.
Understanding Trauma
- Trauma is a disturbing or distressing event that someone experiences.
- Trauma can be experienced due to accidents, physical or emotional abuse, racism/prejudice and other forms of oppression, natural disasters, loss (like the death of a loved one), or something that threatens a person’s safety, mental wellness, loss of control or well-being.
- Trauma affects a person’s way of coping with anxiety, danger, and sadness.
Understanding Trauma Reactions
Trauma affects how we feel, think, act and see ourselves in our bodies. Trauma reactions are the natural but often painful ways that a person may react to dehumanizing and life-threatening experiences.
Trauma reactions tend to fall under these four categories:
- Re-experiencing: Experiencing unwanted intrusive memories, dreams, or flashbacks of the traumatic event.
- Avoidance: Taking extra steps to avoid reminders of the traumatic event.
- Negative changes in thoughts or mood: Not being able to remember aspects of the traumatic incident, or experiencing negative beliefs, self-blame, and diminished interests.
- Hyperarousal and/or Hypervigilance: Traumatized people can startle easily, be more irritable, exhibit risky behavior, or have problems concentrating and sleeping.
Understanding Trauma Reactions in Children Who Experienced Abuse
Managing Back to School Time for Children Who Have Experienced Trauma
Here are some tips for supporting children who experienced trauma as they prepare to go back to school:
Create as much predictability ahead of time as possible.
Create a back-to-school “countdown” where you and your child follow the calendar until their first day of school. Give them context while you count down.
For example, “Yesterday, you had 5 more sleeps until school, and today you have 4…”
Visit the school in the days before school starts so your child can see the building and start to imagine their arrival. If you can’t physically travel, find a picture of the school online that they can look at to get ready. Talk about what will happen on the first day of school. Describe what their day will be like, the activities they’ll be involved in, and your pickup plan.
For example, “This is your school and on your first day, here is where we will walk inside. I will wait for you outside when school is over at X street.”
Familiarize your child with teachers and school staff.
Show your child a photo of their new teacher on their school’s website. If they are returning to their old teacher, remind them of that experience.
You can also contact their teacher and ask them to speak ahead of time, so they can tell you and your child what will happen on the first day. The more your child knows what will happen next, the easier the transition will be—and that’s true for all children!
Give them an item as a symbol to better cope with separation.
Give your child something small they can take with them that helps them think of you when they feel stressed. It can be a keychain, bracelet, or anything else that the school will let them bring that might calm them.
Prepare the teacher and/or school staff ahead of time.
Consider contacting your child’s teacher before school starts. You don’t have to tell them the details of your child’s traumatic experience, but you can give them helpful context so they can be prepared.
For example, “My child is going through a hard time right now, and it’s possible that they may feel some distress about all the new experiences on their first day. If my child seems stressed, they have a trinket in their pocket (bracelet on their wrist, etc.) that can help.”
Need More Help for Your Child? We can help:
We acknowledge the challenges that come with caring for all children, and especially children who experience trauma. Our advocates are able to offer additional guidance.
- Call the Safe Horizon Counseling Center: 347 328 8110
- Call our 24/7 Hotline: 1 800-621-4673 (HOPE)
If you and your child have never received trauma support for their issues, our Child Advocacy Centers may help. Visit safehorizon.org/cac for more information.