By Leah Bourne
October 16, 2016
“It was his birthday when we first went out. He made me feel very close to him very quickly. He called me all the time, and asked me how I was. He was overprotective. I think every woman wants to let a man play that role sometimes.”
“First we lived together, then we got married and had a son. [The abuse started] one step at a time. In the beginning, he wanted to control everything — where I was going; who I was speaking with.”
“Then the physical abuse started. He would hold me and hit my hand, or he would really push me. Then it got even more aggressive. He would take out a knife and play with my face.”
“I knew it wasn’t right, that it wasn’t a healthy relationship, but I didn’t know what to do — this was my family.”
“When he broke my nose I knew I had to do something to move away from him. [That didn’t make it easy]. I know it’s easy to think, ‘She is crazy, why didn’t she just run away?’ What people don’t realize is how dependent I was on him for so many things.”
“I had to go into court to fill out some papers for the report, and that’s when I was introduced to Safe Horizon. At first, I just wanted a safe place to stay overnight with my kids, but then I opened up to therapy. I had to learn that it wasn’t my fault, that it was his fault.”
“Depression [for me] was the hardest part to come back from. People think you have it one day and the next day it’s gone, but it’s something that takes a long time to deal with.”
“I’ve worked very hard to come back from it. I was scared for a long time just thinking that if I see this person, of course he is going to hit me. It took a lot of therapy, and listening to other people’s stories to understand that I was a victim. But I don’t want to be a victim anymore.”
Join Safe Horizon to #PutTheNailInIt and take the vow to end domestic violence. Support victims of domestic violence by painting your left ring fingernail purple, and use the hashtag #PutTheNailinIt to show your vow to end domestic violence.
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